I absolutely relate to this, because that’s how it was with my ex-husband. My new partner understands that sometimes cuddling is just for cuddling, and he enjoys it as well. Still, I internalize this expectation that cuddling or kissing/making out always lead somewhere, or are “supposed to.” So I’ve had out-loud conversations with him about those feelings, and when I’m feeling particularly like I need it to just be snuggles, I tell him so. That way I know that even if he gets aroused, he’s not going to try to take it further.